Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Just a dream...

Its just a dream. Its just a dream. Its just a dream.

Recently, I have been dreaming somewhat similar dreams three nights in a row. These dreams, from the way I see it, are nightmares. Some people say dreams are just, well, dreams. Purely machinations of the brain in our sleep. Some say that it tells something about a person, that it describes some of the latent content of one's mind. Some believe that dreams are indication of one's future. Either way, it really worries me.

The third dream goes something like this:

The setting: an empty, desolate city similar to the one in I Am Legend. I can't really identify which city but it sure is desolate. The situation: I'm the only survivor and I am alone. Or so I thought. It began at night when I overheard a conversation between two men when looked out of a window in the building I was sheltering in. I remember they were saying "Its time to FINISH him off". Just as the man said that, he saw me. Thats when it truly began. They ran and suddenly they were upon me. I was brandishing a Japanese sword and one was training a hunting bow. In a desperate attempt, I leaped out of the window (all the way three stories high). I ran. I ran as fast as my legs could ever hoped to take me. In fact, if this wasn't a dream, I couldn't run as fast as I did because if I did that would be against the laws of physics (gosh!). I zig zagged as I dogded every arrow that flew in my direction. At that moment, I remembered something that was totally unrelated:


"5 things that cannot be returned or taken back; (1) a speeding bullet, (2) A flying arrow, (3) A spoken word, (4) The passing time, (5) The human life taken away by our hands."


That was weird but I managed to lose the two men. I find the chase was very exhilarating, even for a dream. My heart was beating loudly. Just as I taking cover behind a truck, a group of five men half a chain away saw me. They don't look too friendly as they charged towards me. Somehow I had the courage to fight back. As the first man lifted his machete ready to hack my head off, I dashed in closer deeper than his minimum attacking distance and stole his sheathed knife on his waist. It happened in slow motion because I can see him floating in the air as he jumped, 300 Spartan-style. I kicked him away and engaged the next two men in a CQC (Close Quarter Combat) Solid Snake-style. It was scary but very very exhilarating at the same time. Every swing of their sharp weapons I dodged clumsily while desperately trying to disarm them. The rush I felt in my body as their machetes brushed their near-misses at me, for I can see the blade swing past me. The other two men had guns which made me turn and took flight. As they fired, I can feel the bullets whizzing closely to my ears and legs. This feels way too real for a dream, I thought. One bullet hit something and ricocheted onto my left leg. Thank god it was just a dream because if it was it would totally hurt. As the bullet hit me, a thought came to me:


"Everytime you play the fool, you'd only fool everyone else."


Im not sure what that has to do with what's happening around me. The exhilaration of being chased down like a prey is incredible, even for a dream. The men sounded "hungry" and they wanted me dead for reasons I could not understand nor grasp. As I was frantically running, I saw a man waving in my direction and it seems like he was offering me help. He hid me as they angry men with guns went by. My heart was beating wildly as I thanked the man who saved my life. The man looked like Asian because his face was like Jet Li or Jet Li-ish. He seemed like a good person but as he explained whats going on I can't help but notice a small Japanese sword tied around his waist. But who cares. Im safe for now. Just as I turned back to face him, he had already brandished the sword and ready for a terrifying sure-kill stab. i dodged in time and escaped. Long story short, I ran into 3 similar good-guy-wants-stab-me-in-the-back charade. I took refuge in an abandoned car. As I leaned back, another thought came to me (whoa!):


"I could do writing. I have to learn how to avoid slightly purple adjectives and vague imagery. I could also adopt a semi-archaic style."


What was THAT? So I finished resting and decided to get out from where the hell I am (wherever that was). As I emerged outside, I realised how stupid I was to let myself rest in an exposed position. I was surrounded. I can hear them moving around in the ruins. A group of men emerged. This is it, I thought. Before they reached me, they were stopped by another group of men. They were saying something like "He is ours." Another group emerged and a fight ensues between the groups. It became chaotic real quick. I was confused. Really confused. Who should I trust? Where should I run to? What kind of hope is there in this world I'm in? Why did they want me dead? And, I finally lost it. Enraged, I took a machete and started killing the men one by one. I killed every man there was. My vision was red. I was screaming. The violence I inflicted was in the crudest and primitive form. I hacked a man relentlessly. I could see him desperately protecting himself with his hands but it was futile as his limbs came off after a few hacks. There was blood. So much BLOOD. When everyone was dead, I knelt and my face was towards the sky. I laughed. Took a knife. Maybe because of guilt or just because of the sanity lost, I severed my own arm with a knife. I cut my right arm above the elbow (the knife was not good enough so it seemed vividly difficult). As the severed arm fell onto the ground, another thought hit me:


"Keep in faith, Hold on to reason."


I woke up.

The time was 3 a.m. In the dark, I was, like, "what was that all about?" What kind of dream was that? Right before I went back to sleep, another unrelated thought came to me:


"A knife on the table is just a knife. It requires the human agency to pick the knife up and slit someone's throat.
A gun on the table is also just a gun. It, too, requires the human agency to pick it up, point and shoot it at, preferably, let's say, another human being."


Let's see: a dream that's exhilarating, nonsense, weird unrelated thoughts and 3 days in a row. I just totally don't care now. Sometimes I wish I could dream about Love and Romance like I always do when I'm not asleep. Romance...that'd be nice. Just like in the movies.

2 comments:

w A said...

In my humblest crude opinion, perhaps it is because you've been thinking too much about somethin some ideas perhaps that it took over your faculty?

Either way, your command is VERY good. Kudos! @_@

Zen said...

Wa,

maybe. Thanks. but i still lack the transition between events, cohesiveness and descriptions are way too vague and bland.

thxs.