Sunday, January 06, 2013

Just like the first day

Its been two years since I started teaching, I'm still nervous. Its been two years since I started teaching, I still need to rehearse my classes in my head every night before I go to bed. Its been two years and I still pace back and forth thinking of how I should conduct the class and myself. Its been two years and I'm still nervous. To be honest, after two years, I expect my mind to have accustomed to all this. It would be automatic. It would feel natural. Everyday at work is another regular day.

Is it because I'm scared? Is it because I dread the thought of having to do more than just interact with other people? Is it because I am avoiding being emotionally invested and actually showing any genuine emotion in my work?

All of us, in general, dream of a job that is fulfilling at multiple different levels. I have always imagined myself doing repetitive and mundane work. One that does not involve high level of interpersonal interaction. One that involves working with non-human entities; like computers, papers or machines of any kind what so ever. A job that does not oblige me of being emotionally invested. A job that allows me forget what happens at the office as soon as I press my thumb on the scanner. To return home without having it to cling on the back of my head as I watch TV, have dinner, wash dishes, have conversations, brush my teeth, iron my clothes, prop my bed and lie down to sleep.

So, this is a silly, immature and unrealistic thought. I am still very grateful of everything. I do realize that I still have better work benefits than most people deserve.

Here's to the start of the next day.

Cheers. Good night. And early to rise.

Monday, September 17, 2012

its been months and I still can't get myself anything other than this. just this.

Monday, May 14, 2012

Awkward-Zone Veteran

I think I'm always stuck in the most awkward of situations more than any average person should. After all this time I've always wondered why haven't I ever wither and die to continuous over-exposure of element Awkwardium-116. I'd like to think I'm a strong person because I went through most of those situations alone, unflinching and unyielding.

Wherever I go, I will always be locked in these super-awkward situations. It's like im gravitating towards them. and from the way I see it, there's bound to be more of them soon. People must've think that I could a face like the great wall of China by now.

Here's a great song to inspire yourselves with, it comes highly recommended (by me, of course):



                                                p/s: Jason Mraz concert on 19th June and I can't go. My heart breaks.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

I could just scream

So, this pretty much sums up what happens today:


SO. MUCH. CUTE. HNGGHKHH...*diabetes*

Monday, January 30, 2012

Good Birds Don't Fly Away

Just the other night I was playing Armed Assault 2 (ArmA2). It is a brilliant military sim, to say the least.

while i was playing on Armory mode, which lets me test out weapons, vehicle, characters to unlock more of those (you can even play from the eyes of a GOAT), suddenly something really bizarre happened.

So, it goes like this: it was a fine day. I was out stalking my target as usual.

dududu duu hmm.. this is not the guy i want. 

this guy fits the description of driving a vehicle, unarmed. now, i'll just position myself and wait for perfect time to pull the trigger. okay, deep breaths, here we go......

.....and, what is THIS? What the hay is going on here? why am i a bird? A message reads: "Good birds don't fly away from this game. I have only myself to blame". Wow, that's deep..and cryptic.

So, after flying for a few minutes and there was some gunshot below, i was brought to the black screen telling me that my character died.

Respawned. Challenge failed. What in the hay just happened back there?
So, I was left completely puzzled for a few minutes, later, dashed for the forums. It appears that you turning into a bird is actually a DRM (digital rights management) thing. Oh yeah, did i mention i was playing a pirated copy of ArmA 2? In other words, its how Bohemia Interactive Studios punishing you for pirating their game. I've heard of DRM blocking people midgame once they detected your license is a fake. or blocking you from starting the game. But i've never seen the developers trolled on pirates before. Oh yeah, except in that Batman game where you can't hurt the final boss if you're playing a pirated copy. Or Macrovision on DVDs that produces uneven audio and visuals when it detects a duplication process.

Maybe i should get a copy of ArmA 2. Its a pretty good sim, if not ridden by bugs and glitches.

Friday, January 20, 2012

at this rate, i should just sign up for tumblr.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

yup mondays

fluttershy is not pleased.

I don't have elevator rides on my way work nor elevator music to mock at a weekend past. Monday is now out of the way and its time to get to business.